51 pages • 1 hour read
Note: Chapters 17-28 come in the form of short—sometimes one sentence—letters to Les.
Holder apologizes to his sister for not finding Hope sooner.
He then tells her that Hope kept the bracelet that Les gave her, which must mean that the gift mattered.
Holder frets because he doesn’t know what to do about his knowledge of Hope’s past.
He wonders if he should confide in Karen about Sky’s past.
Holder decides against telling Karen because it is possible that Karen is the person who kidnapped Hope.
He contemplates getting advice from his mother.
He decides that telling his mother about Hope would be useless because her expertise is property law, not criminal law.
It is midnight, and Holder worries that he has hurt Sky. He imagines her crying, and it saddens him.
Holder decides to tell Sky everything in the morning.
Unable to sleep, Holder cannot believe that he has found Hope.
Holder thinks that Sky calls herself that name because he used to tell her to think about the sky when she was sad.
Holder tells Les about following Sky on her run that morning, unable to confront her about what he knows because she still doesn’t remember anything about their past together. He understands now why Karen homeschooled Sky and why she doesn’t allow social media or a phone. He knows that he cannot be around Sky without telling her the truth and he feels that the truth will hurt her too much. He decides to stay away from her.
In a letter to Les, Holder wonders whether he should talk to Sky. Unable to understand Karen’s actions and what would bring her to kidnap Hope, he remembers Hope’s father’s arduous search for her in the months after she went missing.
These chapters, all in the form of letters to Les in the notebook Holder writes in, give insight into his emotional state after he discovers that Sky is Hope. These short bursts from Holder, questioning, probing, and interrogating his own memories of Hope’s disappearance, reflect his emotional turmoil and confusion in the wake of this knowledge. Up until this point, Holder has disclosed the history of Hope’s disappearance and how that broke him. Now, he understands its impact on Les. His letter in Chapter 17 apologizes to Les for not finding Hope sooner, explaining, “I can’t help but wonder if it would have made a difference. I’m so sorry” (180). It was also after Hope’s kidnapping that their parents divorced and they moved from Austin. The kidnapping, and not knowing what happened to Hope in the meantime, served as the most important event in all of their lives. Holder’s discovery, then, requires a break in the narrative to fully explore his feelings, further illuminating the theme of Healing from Childhood Trauma.
Though they are short in page space—sometimes only one sentence long—these letters to Les give Holder space to process feelings and attempt to formulate a plan for moving forward. On one hand, he goes against all of the ideas that he comes up with, and by Chapter 28 he feels utterly “hopeless,” seeming back where he started at the beginning of the novel. On the other hand, Hoover presents significant character development in this section. Though Holder feels just as “hopeless,” he is more in control of his emotions and body, refraining from resorting to violence when strong emotions are present and making more use of the notebook or physical activity. This signifies a change connecting to the theme of The Relationship Between Trauma and Violence. Rather than start a fight, Holder runs and expresses his feelings.
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By Colleen Hoover