52 pages • 1 hour read
Content Warning: This section discusses death.
Sloan is trapped emotionally in a loop of unending grief after Brandon’s death, which makes her unable to leave her home. The house, which needs many repairs, mirrors her emotional state as every corner is filled with Brandon’s memory. Sloan can’t even throw away the last beer bottle he left in the garage. The house provides shelter but stagnates Sloan as she isolates herself within its walls, rarely leaving or inviting others inside. She describes its crushing weight: “The house had begun to feel like a sandcastle at high tide. It was crumbling around me” (90). Sloan’s house once represented the shared love between her and Brandon and their plans to start a family. Now, it has become a cold, isolating environment where her dreams and passions go untouched, and her grief paralyzes her.
Sloan begins a new relationship with Jason, and the house forces her to confront the need for change. By inviting Jason into her life and home, Sloan begins to rewrite its significance. As Jason methodically repairs the house, he begins to patch up her heart and build trust. Being with Jason pushes her to finally clean out Brandon’s things, which is both physically and emotionally cathartic. Sloan’s decision to allow new memories to form within the walls signifies her readiness to heal and her willingness to rebuild her life. By transforming the house from a place of mourning into a sanctuary for new beginnings, Sloan asserts her resilience and the joy of Finding Love After Loss. Eventually, the couple sells the house to build a new future together. While on the tour, Sloan is without a home, residing in a different hotel each night. However, she learns to view home as a person, not a place, as “[h]ome was wherever Jason was” (298). Ultimately, they make their home in Ely, sharing it with Kristen and her family, proving that creating a home is not about preserving a space but rather sharing it with those you love.
Jimenez weaves music as a motif throughout the novel, from its title to the playlist that appears at the novel’s end. For Sloan and Jason, music is a central part of their lives and a powerful means of conveying feelings. Jason’s music is more than a career; it allows him to express himself emotionally. Music has always been an integral part of his life since he learned to play guitar from his father. For Sloan, his music helps her process her feelings after Brandon’s death. Thus, they are connected by music long before ever meeting in real life. When she sees and hears Jason sing at Kristen’s house, his music dismantles all her remaining emotional barriers, sparking her desire and need for Jason’s touch. She longs for him to “tune [her] and play [her] like his damn guitar” (155-56).
For Jason, music is a core part of his identity that connects to Art as a Form of Expression and Connection. His lyrics reflect personal truths, allowing him to express himself authentically and vulnerably. Tension emerges when he faces industry pressures to maintain his “Jaxon” persona by performing songs he didn’t write that don’t align with his identity. Not until he loses Sloan does his creativity flourish again, symbolizing how love can reawaken inspiration and purpose. Yet, it’s painful. He says, “The absence swallowed me whole and left nothing behind but emerging chords and painful lyrics that bubbled from a crack in my heart so deep it was fathomless” (320). The song he writes for Sloan reveals his vulnerability and genuine self, offering his fans and unknowingly Sloan a glimpse into his heart. Through heartbreak, music bridges Jason’s internal world and his external reality, allowing him to communicate and connect authentically. Symbolically, their reunification happens at a concert, which mirrors the private concert he gave her earlier in the novel. He declares his love for her to a crowd of thousands, saying that “[s]he was every love song I’ve never been good enough to write” (359), and finds her amidst the crowd, exemplifying his integration of self with his music.
Sloan rescues Tucker when he’s sick and lost. He, in turn, rescues her, symbolizing her need for healing. His unexpected arrival marks the beginning of Sloan’s journey beyond her grief, serving as a literal and figurative lifeline. Tucker, a sporting dog, is a retriever, fatedly sent to retrieve Sloan from the depths of her grief. Tucker symbolizes how animal companionship can be helpful in the recovery process. Tucker disrupts her solitude and introduces a spark of hope with his playful and affectionate nature. He quickly becomes Sloan’s constant companion, forcing her out of her comfort zone and back into the world. Sloan rediscovers her joy and passion for life as she cares for Tucker. By caring for Tucker, Sloan is pushed to move beyond her comfort zone by nurturing and caring for another being. This gives her a renewed sense of purpose. Tucker’s loyalty and dependence on Sloan symbolize her ability to love and connect again, even if she feels broken. As she bonds with Tucker, she confronts her emotional needs, realizing she can heal.
Tucker’s arrival creates Sloan and Jason’s meet-cute, bringing them together when Jason reaches out to reclaim his dog. Jason credits Tucker with finding Sloan, saying, “Tucker knew it. He took one look and saw the other half of me inside of you and brought you home” (286). As the novel progresses, Tucker also symbolizes unconditional love and acceptance. Unwavering in his loyalty and ability to offer comfort without judgment, Tucker is always with Sloan and Jason, even through the turbulent seasons of their relationship. Tucker’s quiet, loving presence provides stability and companionship when life on tour feels lonely. Tucker also symbolizes Jason’s sacrificial love for Sloan when he gives the dog to her in their breakup, feigning his ability to care for him on the road. During their breakup, Tucker’s presence again is a balm for Sloan’s grief. Simultaneously, he is a constant reminder of the loss of the family they had created. Tucker is more than a pet; he becomes a symbol of calming companionship and Sloan and Jason’s destiny to be together.
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By Abby Jimenez