Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind

“We all get anxious—it’s a part of life—yet how we deal with it is critical. If we don’t know how anxiety shows up or why, we might get caught up in temporary distractions or short-term fixes that actually feed it, creating bad habits in the process (have you ever eaten ice cream or cookies when you’re stressed?).”

Dr. Brewer normalizes anxiety by calling it a “part of life.” In this passage, he advances his theme on Knowledge, Empowerment, and Self-Healing by arguing that when people understand how their anxiety is manifesting, they will be able to address it in a meaningful, lasting way.

“Notice how fear itself does not equal anxiety. Fear is an adaptive learning mechanism that helps us survive. Anxiety, on the other hand, is maladaptive; our thinking and planning brain spins out of control when it doesn’t have enough information.”

In this useful passage, the author differentiates between fear and anxiety, noting that anxiety is the more harmful of the two because it causes stress without helping to solve a problem. This passage explains why the human brain is wired to feel fear and how this evolution can be easily misused to create anxious habit loops.

“With the same brain mechanisms as that unnamed cave person, we modern geniuses have gone from learning to survive to literally killing ourselves with these habits.”

This impactful statement summarizes the author’s neuroscience descriptions by emphasizing how modern society has developed too quickly for our brains to catch up. By depicting human brain function as out of date in the modern developed world, the author encourages the reader to feel some self-compassion, while also ringing the alarm bell about how our habits can easily lead us astray in a world filled with addictive experiences and substances.

“Remember, the definition of anxiety is ‘a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.’ When uncertainty abounds, we get anxious and start scratching that itch that says, ‘Do something.’ Stress or anxiety becomes the trigger that urges our cave-person brain out of the cave and into the night, as it tries to figure out what to do (i.e., it enacts a particular behavior), and if our brain comes up with anything that feels like a solution (e.g., I didn’t see anything dangerous), we get the reward of feeling less anxious.”

This description helps the reader understand how anxious thoughts can become habit loops. By pursuing more information or rewarding behavior, people accidentally train their brains to feel anxious, perform certain behaviors, and enjoy the short-term result. This passage helps to demonstrate the connection between anxiety and habit loops, educating the reader on the triggers, behaviors, and results that power the system.

“First gear is all about recognizing our habit loops and seeing the different components clearly: trigger, behavior, and reward. To be clear, reward is a brain term, as in it’s the result of the behavior that at some point was rewarding, that’s why the behavior got reinforced in the first place. The behavior may not seem that rewarding right now, so you can simply think of the habit loop as a trigger, a behavior, and a result.”

The author’s explanation of habit loops empowers the reader to analyze their own three-step loops and map them out. This passage exemplifies Dr. Brewer’s accessible approach and encourages the reader to carry out their “first gear” assignment. This adds to his theme on Knowledge, Empowerment and Self-Healing, as the author directly addresses the reader and expects them to take action to change their own habits.

“Once you’re aware of your habit loops—when you’re on autopilot—you can then get curious about what is happening. Why am I doing this? What triggered the behavior? What reward am I really getting from this? Do I want to keep doing this?”

By coaching the reader to become more mindful of their behavior and its results, the author develops his theme on Mindfulness and Mental Health. This thought-provoking passage encourages the reader to question their own experience and consider how their actions are affecting their lives.

“The reason I use Dave’s story is this: it’s a good example of the simplicity and importance of mapping out habit loops. It doesn’t take a lot of time or an appointment with a psychiatrist or psychoanalyst. It just takes awareness (which is free).”

In this quotation, Brewer persuades the reader to try habit loop mapping on their own, noting that it is a simple but effective tool that only requires their own initiative and awareness. This passage adds to his theme on Knowledge, Empowerment, and Self-Healing, as he emphasizes that the reader can become their own best resource.

“Already this understanding might explain why mindfulness training works best with depression and anxiety: it targets that shared element or perseverative thinking. People who are depressed perseverate about the past, people who are anxious perseverate about the future.”

Because mindfulness tends to decrease autopilot thinking, it can help people develop new thought patterns instead of perseverating. This interesting discussion adds to the author’s theme on The Neuroscience of Anxiety and Addiction, helping the reader understand how rumination is a cornerstone of anxious or depressed thought patterns.

“You can think of these tendencies as helping you see the habitual grooves you might be more likely to fall into. Being aware of this can be really helpful when you are going through the process of changing habits, because if you don’t see these basic tendencies, you can’t change them (both letting go of unhelpful tendencies and leaning into strengths).”

The author argues that developing self-knowledge about one’s own tendencies and personality is a useful way to predict and address one’s own behaviors. This passage adds to his theme on Knowledge, Empowerment, and Self-Healing as he emphasizes the connection between thorough understanding and effective action.

“Your brain has to choose what to lay down as habit, and what not to do again. Remember, you learn a habit based on how rewarding the behavior is. The more rewarding it is, the stronger the habit.”

This reminder solidifies the reader’s knowledge about habit loops and brain function, deepening the author’s theme on The Neuroscience of Anxiety and Addiction. With this information, the author makes a connection between awareness and power. Understanding the reasoning behind habit loops gives people a newfound power over their own minds.

“The world is filled with panaceas sold to you to make you avoid pain and feel good. Clothes, cars, pills, experiences - all are packaged and tied with neat little bows of ‘this will relieve your aches and pains,’ ‘this will make you feel good,’ or ‘this will help you forget your worries.’ But if you stay in your comfort zone, you will never grow.”

This motivating passage galvanizes the reader to push through the discomfort of habit change to transform their lives. The author’s depiction of an addictive world will ring true to many readers. This discussion inspires the reader to consider how they have been comforting themselves and how they can address these habits and pursue self-growth instead.

“Our anxious sleeper was able to reflect on his previous experiences of going down the anxiety rabbit hole, which, when seeing how unhelpful it was for sleep, helped him avoid going down the hole again. Sometimes reflecting with hindsight is actually a better time for learning because you are less emotionally affected.”

This passage explains that people can reflect mindfully on their actions in the moment, or in hindsight. By allowing people to use hindsight as a part of their mindfulness, Dr. Brewer helps the reader consider their missteps to be valuable learning opportunities rather than failures.

“The posterior cingulate cortex—the brain region that is activated when we get caught up in experience—but which also quietens down when we meditate, are mindful, or otherwise let go—was the only brain region that was activated during both delight and disgust.”

In this passage, the author adds to his theme on The Neuroscience of Anxiety and Addiction by explaining the PCC’s role in generating both cravings and rumination. This brain region registers both pleasure and repulsion, leading Brewer to suggest that mindfulness could help people shift their perception of their vices from pleasurable to unrewarding by paying close attention to their experiences.

“You can’t think your way out of a bad habit or into a good one. As much as we all have wishes and plans for our habits, our feeling body (which is where behavioral outcomes register) trumps our thinking mind.”

In this passage, the author bases his advice on his knowledge of the brain, advancing his theme on The Neuroscience of Anxiety and Addiction. By reminding the reader that the “thinking” part of their brain is generally weaker than the “feeling” part, he persuades them to tap into their feelings using mindfulness rather than relying on willpower alone.

“Knowing that a habit is bad for us isn’t enough to change it. Even if we come up with the most well-reasoned plan to diet and lose weight, why is it that more often than not, we’ll fall into yo-yo dieting (the endless cycle of losing weight, then gaining it back?) We are focusing too much on the rider to change habits and addictions, and it’s not working. In the United States alone, opioids and obesity have been described as epidemics.”

The author uses the analogy of a rider on a wild horse to illustrate how the thinking mind is easily overpowered by the stronger and more ancient neural pathways in the brain. By claiming that the “rider,” or rationality and willpower, cannot stop addictive behavior, the author is challenging traditional approaches to treatment and urging the reader to consider alternatives.

“Of all our human capacities, curiosity is at the top of my list of most essential. From helping us learn to survive in the world to bringing the joy of discovery and wonder, curiosity really is a superpower.”

Brewer extols the values and rewards of curiosity, helping to frame this natural human emotion as a powerful reward for the brain and a tool to lean on when cravings kick in. By calling curiosity a “superpower,” the author adds to his theme on Mindfulness and Mental Health, suggesting that bringing curiosity and awareness to their discomfort will transform people’s relationships with their habits.

“All of us need to keep this in mind: change can be scary, but it doesn’t have to be. The more we can learn to lean into the discomfort of difference—recognizing that we might be nervous simply because something is new to us—the more we can make ourselves at home in our growth zone.”

By contrasting the familiarity of the comfort zone and the “discomfort of difference,” the author persuades the reader to embrace the challenge of leaving their comfort zone by doing something different. By referring to the “growth zone,” Brewer reminds the reader of the value of a growth mindset, bolstering his theme on Knowledge, Empowerment, and Self-Healing.

“Often, trying to break a bad habit can be all-consuming. In fact, we might be willing to do whatever it takes to get the job done. This win-at-all-costs can actually have significant costs, including increased frustration and stress when brute force doesn’t work. If this is the case for you, finding ways to help yourself pay attention and ride those waves of stressful urges instead of getting sucked into frustration habit loops can help keep your prefrontal cortex online so you don’t make things worse.”

Brewer debunks the idea that sheer willpower is an effective anti-habit strategy, associating it with frustration and burnout. By framing frustration as a habit loop of its own, the author communicates a powerful warning to the reader.

“As she started to see that this habit loop was not helpful, her binges started to decrease in intensity, frequency and duration. More important, as part of this healing process, she recognized another habit loop: one of self-judgment.”

Brewer addresses the connection between people’s relationships with themselves and their relationships with their habits, acknowledging that wrestling with habits can spur feelings of shame, guilt, and judgment. This passage is particularly relatable for the reader, and Brewer’s advice will help them dismantle the negative commentary they generate as they work with their habits.

“I was very resistant to practicing loving kindness when I first learned it because it seemed too touchy-feely—my kumbaya meter was off the charts. It took me years of practice before I saw how helpful and valuable it was.”

Brewer admits to feeling skeptical about the concept of a loving kindness meditation. This passage makes the author relatable to the reader, who may also feel doubtful or alienated by this practice. This personal admission persuades the reader to reconsider trying a loving kindness practice as one facet of their own meditation.

“Being curious helps you hack your rewards-based learning system, replacing habitual reactions with awareness and flipping the reward from ‘contracted, feel a little better,’ to ‘expanded curiosity, feels pretty good.’”

The author presents curiosity as a reward for the brain instead of the pleasurable vice it would usually get. This intriguing claim grabs the reader’s attention and bolsters the author’s theme on The Neuroscience of Anxiety and Addiction, reminding the reader that the brain must receive some kind of healthy reward to dismantle a bad habit.

“These mental skills aren’t hard to learn, they just need to be practiced a lot so they become your new habits.”

In this passage, Brewer reminds the reader that practice and consistency are key. Using his characteristic positivity to coach the reader to success, the author makes success seem like a real possibility in this motivating quotation.

“If you’d rather lean into the science and trust your own experience, look at how far you’ve come already, simply from learning how your mind works, and working with your mind. Keep building your own faith, one moment at a time.”

The author grounds his argument in scientific evidence rather than flowery inspirational phrases. By suggesting that the reader respects scientific literature and their own observations, Brewer builds their confidence in the process and motivates them to try mindfulness themselves.